Humpday Hotty: Lea Michele

Alright I don't watch Glee for shit but apparently there are some slammin' hot pieces of young ass on that show. And this Lea Michele is a real smoker.

Iran and the New Warfare

The Shadow War

A vicious and shrewd plot came to me courtesy of a New York Times article today. The article in today's paper by Thomas Erdbrink reports that Iran as "unplugged" some computers in the powerful Oil Ministry Monday in response to a virus attacked which started Sunday and may have deleted data from the Ministry's servers.

The question that rocketed into my mind was this...who would be perpetrating these cyber-attacks on Iran?... Last year centrifuges used to enrich Uranium for Iran's nuclear program were attacked by a virus called "Stuxnet". Although Israeli officials were giddy with the viruses success, no perpetrator of the attacks has come forward.

Applying the "cui bono" (who benefits?) logic to this article had my mind warping together a possibly scheme that will change warfare as we know it, and it is being tested on Iran as we speak.

Who would benefit from the attacking of the Iranian nuclear program is easy and the list is long. The US and Israel lead Western powers against Iranian interests. Clearly the security of Israel is at least symbolically protected by the active attacking of Iran's nuclear aspirations.

But who would benefit from a successful attack against Iran's Oil Ministry is slightly more complicated. The US government benefits in any situation where Iran's vulnerability comes to the surface, especially after the two countries' recently strained relationship. The price of oil will undoubtedly be affected by the incident, or at least OPEC will use it as a pretense to magically elevate the already-criminal price of crude oil. And if there is one certainty about anything in this global economy, oil is always big business.

My first thought was it is child's play for a NSA attack to cripple centrifuges used to enrich uranium, or send a virus to disrupt the oil industry in a country George W. Bush described as one leg of "The Axis of Evil".

But then I rethought the shrewd nature of the US government. Surely if they were involved it would be in a less direct and conspicuous way, someone else would definitely be left holding the bucket if the plan went to shit somehow. A clear option would be for the NSA or CIA to enlist known hackers to the cause using either the threat of federal hacking charges on those already under investigation, or cold hard cash to the free hacker groups living in the shadows. Using hackers would give the the government deniability if shit hit the fan.

Even better cover for a government-hacker pact against Iran is the vast press coverage given to hacker groups such as Anonymous. Viewed by internet-dwellings as protectors of internet freedom, the hacking groups are direct foils to the government, making an agreement between the two seem ridiculous.

This is a grim hypothetical on a day when the New Orleans Saints are being dragged through the mud for allegedly recording opposing coaches from 2002-04, on top of the bounty scandal of a month ago.

I think it's safe to assume Roger Gooddell is poised to drop the hammer on one team for two offenses most contending teams probably have perpetrated blatantly for years. Now, thanks to precedents established by Major League Baseball and government oversight of sport, the FBI is involved in the soon-to-be coronated "Tape-Gate" which will be added to the list of "Bounty-Gate" and "Spy-Gate". The mileage sports gets out of Watergate references is shocking.

Back to the matter at hand, Iran. I think that Us involvement in the attacks against Iran in some way can be taken for granted. The talks between Iran and Western powers has been almost as infalmmatory as that posturing midget in North Korea.

More importantly these attacks show a new direction in warfare the US may take to combat terrorists and other nations. A vile march into Tehran by the US Marine Corps would certainly be made easier if every military server in Iran was melted to the consistency of scrambled eggs due to some super-virus the NSA is spawning. The effect would be a new type of "total war".

This "Total Electronic War" would see the blitzkrieg-like US Air Force bombs preceded by strategic cyber-attacks to disrupt key military communications. Nations, especially non-Westernized ones, would find these cyber-attacks as crippling as any ordinance.

Is it so hard to imagine the US government hiring hackers to help develop cyber-weaponry? This is the same government with a track record of outsourcing to organized crime and assorted criminals throughout US history. It is logical that if the CIA or NSA need a virus, they would reach out to hackers who regularly attack corporate sites. If you can't employ the best, then hire them out from the lowest reaches of the internet.

The Hacker Army

From the other side of the coin could hackers, the "Robin Hood's" of the internet, protectors of free information and enemies of exploitative corporations, sell-out to the Department of Defense?

Well, in many cases they might not have much of a choice. Most people can relate to choosing working for the enemy over a federal indictment on hacking charges. The government may even become bold and reach out to known hackers that aren't up on charges. These, the true capitalist swine among hackers, would jump at the deep pockets of Uncle Sam.

Better to make a mountain of money working as a "government consultant" or "contractor" than rot in a prison cell. On top of access to the NSA's super-computers, and every luxury they could "need" to help develop cyber-weapons for deployment against Iran and others would be made available.

It is a scary time, and even scarier still if the public or media ever catch on to the persistent cyber-attacks against Iran and the most likely source of these attacks. Somewhere in a government facility an ex-internet freedom fighter is creating the newest virus to be tested against the evil flavor-of-the-day, Iran.

Humpday Hotty: Joanna Krupa

BOOM. Why has it been so long and I haven't put the Polish-born bombshell in? Well, wait no longer gents.

NHL Playoffs

If you haven't been watching the 2012 NHL Playoffs then you are missing out. Game after game for the past week has been full of scoring and fighting. I mean come on, compared to the meaningless daily void of April baseball season and whatever mind-numbing dumbass sports are on the Stanley Cup Playoffs are the shit.

I mean a women's basketball draftee was on ESPN yesterday, so you know they're digging for anything. The Flyers Penguins series alone has been non-stop face-smashing and goal-scoring. Patrick Elias, that old fuck, is continuing his beastly season to try and get the Devils back on top. And as of right now the Bruins grinded out a 2-1 lead in their hard-hitting series against the Caps.

Watching this awesome hockey has led me to question why the fuck Americans don't watch more hockey? I mean baseball before August is so boring and meaningless it makes me want to cave my skull in with a rock. And the NBA Playoffs start soon but I know none of you watch that besides me.



During the playoffs about 75% of goals scored are ridiculous and though normally the referees make it a point to not allow brawling for the playoffs, this year all bets are off. People getting duffed all over the place. The Penguins and Flyers racked up 150 penalty minutes including what during the 3rd period turned out to be a 20 minute intermission so about seven different face-thrashings could resolve. Even Sidney "The Pussfart" Crosby tried to be tough, in a 2v1. The game also included 12 goals.

Bottom line is, if you aren't at least watching some hockey for the next few weeks, you are an idiot.

Mind-Altering Substances and the Fear of Understanding

"Death comes at you no matter what you do in this life, and to equate drugs with death is a facile comparison."
-Jerry Garcia

The idea that the mind free from chemicals is the best mind is at the heart of societies ingrained fear of drugs. The idea that a person is born with "normal" chemicals in their brain and outside ones should only be administered if there are deficiencies is a very conservative bent on the mystical organ of human thought and cognition.

The altering of neurophysiology is something to be explored by the brave psychonaut.

If a doctor can prescribe strong narcotics for physical and mental illness as slight as not being able to sleep, why not be able to try and make the spirit more whole by exploring the inner reaches of the brain and soul. If the average human can only harness 10% of their brain power then why should we make war against the use of chemicals to explore that 90% of the unknown. If space and the deep sea are both considered "final frontiers", why shouldn't the unknown super-computer held up by our chicken-neck be considered one as well?

Why would something native cultures use, like DMT-based Ayahuasca in South America and peyote buttons in Central America, to have spiritual experiences be shunned as archaic and backwards and pagan?

The Hallucinogenic cactus, Peyote

If there was a hallucinatory rite in Christendom would our ideas about these chemicals be different? I would say drastically so.

If Jesus had a taste for the potent hashish or opium I'm sure the bias of the Christian world would sway people in a different direction as far as acceptance of drug use.

It's not to say that all drugs are spiritually useful, even a firm libertarian might cringe at my ideal that all substances should be legal from consumption.

The simple question to ask yourself is "Would I shoot heroin if it was legal?" Most people would probably answer no to that question. But some would certainly try it, and it is in my mind an inalienable right for someone to have the freedom to do so unless their use or abuse of the drug affects others directly. Why should governments dictate what we put into our own bodies?

Instead drugs like heroin are used as foils to the drugs that pharmaceutical lobbyists and doctors prescribe to us that may act just like heroin (Oxycontin) or speed (Adderall), and in fact contain the same chemicals as illegal street drugs. But prescription drugs are hoisted onto a pedestal as "safe" even though no doctor is immune from misdiagnosing a condition, and of course the FDA would never let a dangerous drug slip through the cracks because the company producing it spent a billion dollars to do so. So our children are given speed and their parents are given narcotic sleep aides to sleep for the entire night. And the line separating "good drugs" from "bad drugs" is carved into stone.

Studies are beginning to reveal that prescription drugs can be far more deadly and addicting than illegal drugs, and coke sales don't profit Phizer. It is estimated that over 75% of college students use prescription ADD/ADHD medications like Adderall (amphetamines) and Ritalin (Methylphenidate) to help their studies.


Another argument for the legalization, regulation, and taxation of drugs is the purity factor. When I was in elementary school the D.A.R.E. (Dare Abuse Resistance Education) officer scared us by telling as "we wouldn't know what we were getting" from a drug dealer. Years later I laugh at the prospect of getting marijuana that is tainted at all, it is easy to spot any sort of inconsistencies with real marijuana. And most people can identify marijuana easily. But hard drugs are an entirely different story. Coke and MDMA can be cut with any number of things; other drugs such as speed, or baby laxative and more harmless fillers.

The average high school student cannot identify common cutters in their Ecstasy, the booming drug of our generation. The raver is a mainstream youth image, electronic music fills the radio stations 24/7. The younger people are just emulating the experienced ravers they here about and see at concerts. They take our lead into drug use. When I was in high school prescription painkillers were new on the scene and easy to get, but now "rolls", "skittles", and "beans" are all over my old high school. 

The times are changing. Snorting "bath salts" is all the rage. Fake marijuana like K-2; a direct result of the prevalence of the most hated weapons of the law; the drug test, is flying off the shelves as the DEA pushes it up the noses of monkeys to correctly classify, and ban, these synthetics as fast as possible. In a sense, a plant has been outlawed only to be replaced by a more dangerous synthetic substitute directly as a result of U.S. drug policy.


And the financial benefits of legalizing, regulating, and taxing drugs that generate billions of dollars annually are obvious. Take the cash from the black market and use it to fund our bloated government, that could lose the cash infusion.


Peoples' initial reaction, carefully crafted by our government, to drugs is an authoritarian one. The government can't tell me not to own a gun, but evil drugs?! No one should be able to enjoy them at all. The FDA is probably the most treacherous federal agency besides the IRS/DEA potent tandem that crushes everything in its path.


The one fact that undermines the drug war the U.S. government insists on fighting is this: people want to alter their consciousness, and the enforcement of law is barely an afterthought. Every drug bust leaves a dealer's competitors with a higher demand for their product. The laws of economics trumps the laws of society almost every time. Until it is less profitable for a kid in an urban ghetto to sell cocaine than get a "real" job, the drug war will never be over. Demand will never die for drugs in the U.S. or the world.


But why is this seemingly unquenchable desire for humans to experiment with chemicals viewed as dangerous? Surely holistic medicine is the result of centuries of experimentation with various healing methods. Experimentation with cause and effect is the basis of science as we understand it. Ask any scientist how he came to his or her breakthroughs in their field, they test and experiment and repeat until they find a suitable result. Science brought us drugs like LSD and MDMA anyway, so why deny that progress in civilization leads to an increasing dialogue on drugs, as drug companies crank out newer, more effective prescription drugs to help us sleep, get erections, and focus on work.


It is also prudent to mention that almost all now-illegal drugs have roots in legal medical practices and remedies. Not even a hundred years ago cocaine and heroin were both available over-the-counter in drug stores across the country. The reason the practice failed in the early days was the public was not educated to the risks of the ingredients in the remedies. Surely a well-regulated and taxed drug industry would involve labels and classifications of every single type of drug available.


The point is a basic one; how can on one hand our government put some substances out of our reach and with the other force feed us other, sometimes more addicting and volatile and less-researched than the "street drugs" they replace?